Posture or Posturing
Observation is an intensive effort- Some people can beautifully conceal whereas others exercise no control and reveal themselves in various ways.
Even though I am an ambivert, I tend to lean towards introversion and hence avoid excessive social interaction, but this side of my personality also pushes me to be an aggressive and efficient observer to make the most out of the limited time span I want to spend in a situation while walking away with useful information that I wanted to gather from the very beginning.
Let me clarify, aggressive observation does not mean hasty or brash or first-impression-driven observation, and by no means you must jump to conclusions. Observation itself can be an intensive effort, and people can reveal themselves in various ways, leaving you with pathways to intercept the situation and see how they twitch, purse their lips or squint their eyes at the mention of a particular word or when someone in the room makes a specific point — all these hint at ways they want to be spoken to, and how they draw boundaries and reveal preferences for some specific attitudes at the table.
Some people can beautifully conceal whereas the others exercise no control, and if you are anyone like me then you might feel deeply entertained by just listening in to someone’s banter. Beware of some evident straying attempts, as some visual statements can be quite intentional- like the way someone dresses, or wears a certain air about himself or herself or has a certain kind of gait.
These signals are only as useful as your ability to differentiate between intentional and subconscious or involuntary signals.
Conventional wisdom says to watch out for people who look a ‘certain’ way, but with some practice, you would be able to differentiate between posture and posturing.
Look out for ways somebody sinks in their chair or tries to be more upright than their natural posture allows. Observe how someone places their elbows on the armrest or clutches their hands, too eager to go through, too invested to leave it out on the table, or lean back in the chair to feign a relaxed position even though their mind races for the opposite.
Try to see through the people who extend their arms a little further than normal, or they try to be too erect, too attentive or when their casualness around the space looks too studied and effortful- beware as they may well be striking a pose for you, to be perceived a certain way, to be taken seriously or to apparently look like they are giving away the power they desperately want to clutch.
However, of course, the most authentic window to their real selves is the Eyes- it gives away what they try to hide. Be it business or poker, eyes do it all.
“Notice the eye contact people make across the room, it will help you see who holds the power and authority and real influence”.
It will reveal who is the real force behind the veil, whose validation will the team seek and who will they fall back on in times of uncertainty or crises. Eyes will reveal what they’re thinking behind the controlled physical demeanour. There’s a reason some people in power are fans of wearing glasses, with obscure lens films and broad rims in meeting rooms. Now you know who to observe the next time you meet them.
Share below if you’ve noticed specific behaviours that give away if someone is posturing successfully or otherwise!
